How To Deal With Opinions About Your Wedding
The road to planning a wedding is certainly not without its bumps. Some of the biggest bumps? Other opinions. Being bombarded with thoughts and opinions that are not your own can not only be stressful for you, but can also be stressful for your relationship with your partner. While every couple, family, and wedding is different, we have found that there are three important things to keep in mind to keep you sane when you start feeling like you are drowning in unsolicited opinions.
Sometimes people say things because they want to feel like they have something to contribute. Think of someone else's thoughts on how you should plan your wedding as small talk. You may not really care what someone has to say about how rainy it's been lately, just like you don't really care about what Jane has to say about serving chicken at your wedding. In the end, providing thoughts gives the other person something to talk about and it gives you insight into their personality and what they have to say. Plus, you never know, maybe their suggestion might lead you to a new idea that you want to develop further. In your own way, of course.
2. Considering is better than saying no
That's the other thing: just because you are listening to someone's suggestions, does not mean that you have to take them. Sometimes the people who are closest to you who are invested in your special day share their thoughts because they want to be heard. Just like you want your ideas about your dream wedding to be heard, your family may want the same. If your ideas don't match up, it doesn't hurt to nod along and listen to their thoughts.
Some of the best ways to follow up on unsolicited opinions are: "thank you for your suggestion, we'll look into that!" or "that's an interesting idea, we will consider that". Even if you have already considered it and have already decided that you don't want to do it, telling the other person that you appreciate their input and will take it to consideration will (hopefully) effectively end the conversation without starting an argument.
3. It's your day
When it comes down to it, your wedding is about you and your partner. No one else. Your wedding day should be an expression of the two of you, not the people who are feeding (or force-feeding) you their opinions. Your wedding will be beautiful no matter what-- whether you chose the red flowers or the white, the buffet or the seated dinner-- and while it may take some time for your family and friends to see that, on the day of the wedding no one else's opinions will matter anymore anyway.